CAMPER VAN MEMORIES AND EXPLODING TOILETS

Back in May, I eulogised about the VW Transporter Kombi and finished with the question, is the VW Transporter Kombi the ultimate family transport? Well, in my experience…… not quite. You see from 1999 to 2004, we owned a VW camper van – a 1995 Autosleeper Trident based on a VW Transporter T4 (the current generation Transporter is the T6). This is another reason why I have come to enjoy driving vans so much. It has been interesting comparing modern T6s (of which I have now driven a few) and our old T4. With its non-turbo, 2.4 litre five cylinder diesel engine and a mighty 78hp, our old van was on the slow side and noise levels meant that travelling at anything over 60mph (100kph) was a trial. The modern VW Transporter is a dream by comparison. The purchase of our camper van was the fulfilment of an ambition fuelled by my fond childhood memories of French holidays in the van my parents bought in the late 1960’s. A classic 1967 VW Type 2 split screen camper with green lower bodywork and off-white above. What would that be worth today??! It was a Canterbury-Pitt conversion for those interested.
When we first bought our Autosleeper Trident in October 1999, our two kids were about 3 years old and 18 months old and we soon found out that, for a family with young children, the benefits of a camper van were many. A VW Transporter is not much bigger than a large MPV so it can be used as a normal car every day of the week. However, on days out a camper van becomes a civilised changing room (for nappies as well as clothes!), wash room, café, toilet and of course, bedroom. The versatility doesn’t end there. When you can no longer avoid doing those jobs around the house and garden, there is plenty of space for junk to go to the tip or for purchases from the DIY store or, worse still, IKEA.
Van May 2002
Our Autosleeper Trident. Somewhere in Suffolk in 2002.
Over the four summers we had it, our van took us on a tour around Devon and Cornwall, to the French Alps, to Cornwall again(!) and then to the mountains of northern Spain (via the two-night ferry crossing from Portsmouth to Bilbao) and back through the length of France. In addition, there were numerous cheap weekends away including our very first night camping in the van in … Sandringham (so, it was a truly nostalgic return in June this year). The beauty of a camper van holiday is that you can do as much or as little preparation and research as you like before you go. For a foreign holiday, just book the ferry or simply turn up at the Channel Tunnel and off you go (but don’t forget travel and breakdown insurance and any necessary legal requirements for motoring abroad!). If you wish, you can make up or change your itinerary as you go. If you come across a place you really like – well, just stay a few nights and enjoy it. Freedom is the word that springs to mind.
Van July 2001
France 2001 returning from northern Spain
The disadvantages of a camper van are very few but we (or rather my wife) did discover one hazard of having a mobile toilet. If anyone is familiar with Porta-Potties they will know that the waste is contained in a sealed (and airtight) tank which forms the bottom half of the toilet. On our summer holiday in the French Alps, we had descended from a lofty summit when one child decided they needed to avail themselves of our portable convenience quite urgently. No problem. We just pulled over in a lay-by and my wife sat small child on the Porta-Potti. Once finished, the product of this call of nature sat on the sliding lid of the waste tank. In accordance with Porta-Potti protocol, my wife started to open this lid …. suddenly there was a loud “PHHSHHHT” from the toilet followed by a loud “URRGH!” from my wife…… Now, I know I really should not have laughed (nor indeed failed to have recovered from my helpless convulsions in order to help clear up the mess) but only the most serious-minded, cheerless soul would deny that an exploding toilet and a faceful of wee (provided it’s someone else’s face) is pure comedy gold. Of course, we had used the Porta-Potti (and closed the airtight waste tank) some time earlier at the top of the mountain where the air pressure is lower. Now, down in the valley, where the air pressure was greater …. well, let’s not get too scientific.
IMG_20170802_0001
These happen to be Spanish mountains (the Picos de Europa) but be careful with your Porta-Potti whichever mountain range you explore! Our van is amongst the trees.
In addition to all the pleasure (and laughs) we got from our van, there was also another benefit. In terms of overall cost, it was the cheapest vehicle we have ever owned. Insurance was cheap (through specialist motor caravan insurers), fuel consumption was comparable to a petrol-engined family car at the time and servicing costs were similar to a car. And the biggest cost of owning a motor vehicle – depreciation – was spectacularly good because these vehicles hold their value really well (especially the combination of a VW base vehicle and conversion by a top converter such as Autosleeper). Sadly, our van was stolen off our driveway and never recovered but the payout we received from the insurance company meant that depreciation cost us less then £500 a year. Even in 2004, that was not bad for all that fun and cheap holidays!
Happily, that was not the end of our camper van ownership. The VW was replaced by a Ford Transit-based camper which we managed to keep hold of for eight years.
Colin

GOING WEST IN A VW TRANSPORTER KOMBI – THE ULTIMATE FAMILY TRANSPORT?

Test Match Special is back for the summer! YYYES!! In case you are wondering what I am on about, Test Match Special is the BBC’s legendary radio coverage of England’s international cricket matches. I am a TMS addict. In fact I am listening to England’s one day international against Ireland as I write this. All this puts me in mind of a delightful day out late last October when I delivered a Volkswagen Transporter Kombi to Clevedon just south of Bristol. Why was this such a delightful day out? Well, four reasons:-
  1. I was driving one of my favourite vehicles. I enjoy driving vans and the VW Transporter is the best, particularly (as far as I am concerned) in Kombi configuration.
  2. Summer had forgotten to turn into autumn. Unusually for Britain at that time of year, it was pleasantly warm and the sky nothing but blue.
  3. I was able to listen to TMS on the van’s DAB radio – the first day of England’s test match against Bangladesh. This added to the summery feel although for England this was a winter tour match in far away Bangladesh!
I know, that’s only three reasons but I’ll come to the fourth shortly. For the uninitiated, the Kombi is a version of Volkswagen’s Transporter panel van (the direct descendent of the famous Type 2 van) with windows in the side doors and a second row of seats. The rear third of the vehicle reverts to pure van, being a big empty space and no windows in the side panels.
I had a breeze of a journey westwards then down the M5 motorway to Clevedon (about 140 miles) and a very pleasant train ride home, starting at the charming station of Yatton. With its picturesque stone-built cafe on the sun-drenched platform (had time for a cuppa!), this tidy little country station seemed a throwback to the heyday of rail travel. All that was missing were milk churns on the platform and a steam engine pulling elegant, glossy green or burgundy carriages. I also had the satisfaction of being able to split tickets to save about £20 on the train fare back to Leicester (if you missed it, learn about splitting tickets here!).
Coming back to the subject of driving vans, I find them more comfortable on long journeys than a lot of cars. I like the upright seating position in a van compared to a car’s feet-out-in-front posture. Also, sitting high up looking out over most other vehicles just makes you very relaxed. In addition, today’s vans generally offer a good ride and easy, refined cruising at motorway speeds. And the VW Transporter is the best of all with its slick gear change via a short lever which sprouts handily out of the dashboard and a confidence-inspiring ability to go round corners. The particular Kombi I was driving had a lesser engine option (102hp) and only a 5 speed ‘box but that didn’t matter as it was more than up to the job. It also came in a high spec (“Highline”) with such creature comforts as air conditioning, cruise control, leather-covered steering wheel and, best of all, that DAB radio (you can only listen to Test Match Special on DAB or Long Wave). The Transporter is a smart looking machine especially in the dark blue metallic paint sported by this particular Kombi.
VW Transporter kombi
But I haven’t got to the best bit – the fourth reason why this was such a good day out. It was the customer. To this day, he is still the most excited and enthusiastic customer I have yet delivered to. And with my liking for vans, I can understand why. Friends have asked me, of all the vehicles I have delivered, which one would I like to keep for my own. Well, it would be this one. Actually, that’s not true. It would be the Bentley Mulsanne Speed. But I would sell the Bentley and buy a Transporter Kombi and a house by the sea.
The customer’s enthusiasm made me jealous of a new vehicle owner for the first and only time since I have been doing this delivery work. He very kindly offered to give me a lift to Yatton station (in the Kombi of course) and all the way we talked with a shared enthusiasm about the vehicle. The conversation was interspersed at regular intervals with excited exclamations of “this is brilliant” and “this is awesome” from the customer. I learned that he had a young family and this was to be his family transport as well as the vehicle he would use for his small business. The Kombi was to replace an old Mercedes E-class estate with which he was not very enamoured. He and his family were into beaches and surfing. Forget what car companies try to sell us as “Sports Utility Vehicles”, the Kombi is a true SUV. Room for six people and a whopping load area for all sorts of sporting, leisure and/or holiday paraphernalia. There would even be room for an ironing board should you wish to indulge in a bit of extreme ironing, which as you all know (having read the post “Bradford and a Stormtroopin’ Evoque“) was invented in Leicester.
So don’t you get all that with a large 4×4? No. Most 4x4s could not match the Kombi for load or even passenger space. And don’t think that this is a huge unwieldy beast – it is shorter than a Mercedes E-Class estate and a Range Rover. In my view, the Kombi is a much more honest, down to earth vehicle than any 4×4/SUV (many SUV’s not actually being four wheel drive despite appearances). The vast majority of families are far more likely to make use of the people and load carrying capabilities of a Kombi than the four wheel drive benefits of a 4×4. Think of days out with house guests, trips to the tip, holidays, picking up that new fridge and pastimes involving really big things. Compare that with the only real advantage of a 4×4 for most people, which is the ability to get to work on the 1 or 2 days a year that it snows. So 4×4 owners can feel really smug about getting to work while the rest of the population get an extra 1 or 2 days holiday (er, I mean they get to work at home).
So, is the VW Transporter Kombi the ultimate family transport?
Colin